Mistaken Identity Or God?
by Myshawolf
Summary: Here it is what happened with Fudge to get Sirius's Pardon. An addition to my other fic, Dancing With The Lady Death. Rated Pg for God references and wholesome Gaurdian fun at Fudge's expense. Bring The kids!


Myshawolf and Dinybones walk out. Dinybones is counting up her money from the last story.  
  
MW: So, how much did you make?  
  
Dinybones: About 50 dollars.  
  
MW: 50! How did you get that much? It should only be about 20.  
  
DB: I conned Thief out of thirty. I sold him this really old remote that I told him could control the words on the page.  
  
MW: (Trying to suppress a laugh) Does it?  
  
DB: Hell No. It's the remote to someone's garage.  
  
MW: (Laughing) Poor Thief. I almost feel bad for him. (to the Audience) Hello. Welcome to the interim fic between Dancing With The Lady Death and Treasure Of Atlantis. Just to warn you, things in this story will get a little crazy.  
  
DB: That's putting it mildly.  
  
MW: Anyways. There is some Fudge bashing. He is not my most favorite person right now. The old coot. (Looks up at the sky) No Smiting this time. I'm only showing how much of an idiot Fudge is. You'll see soon. Enjoy.  
  
Mistaken Identity Or God!?  
  
Fudge sat in his plush office at the Ministry. Lazily he looked over various documents from his Aurors. To any normal, open-minded person, the documents would have indicated an increase in Death eater activity. Fudge only saw Dumbledore's treachery and that his Aurors needed more training. He snorted over each report and carefully filed them away in the waste paper basket. This was a normal day for Fudge ever since the escape of Sirius Black. Fudge was convinced that Dumbledore was hiding Black up at the school. In fact, Dumbledore was hiding a lot at the school. A death eater, a giant, Fudge wondered how much was really up there.  
  
Fudge was about to send an owl up to the school informing McGonagall that he was coming for an inspection of the staff, when he felt that feeling that he wasn't alone. Fudge looked around to see who had entered his office without permission. He searched high and low. He didn't however check the rafters high above his head. If he did, he would have noticed two figures sitting there planning.  
  
Thunder whispered to his partner, "So what's the plan again?"  
  
Nightmare whispered back, "We are going to try and reason with Fudge while Present retrieves the Rat from limbo."  
  
"Is he ready to confess?"  
  
"After being locked up with his worst fears for six weeks straight, oh yeah. I think we should begin."  
  
Thunder nodded before he shouted, "Fudge!"  
  
Fudge began to look frantically about, "Who's there?"  
  
Thunder chuckled. This guy was so clueless. Thunder got an idea and decided to have some fun. Nightmare wasn't the only sadistic one in the group.  
  
"I am who am." Thunder boomed. Nightmare gave him an odd look.  
  
"Who?" Fudge cried.  
  
"I'm Someone who you have feared meeting for a long time." Thunder continued ignoring the look that Nightmare was giving him.  
  
Fudge thought for a moment and then paled, "God?"  
  
Thunder was thrown off. He aiming for be coming Fudge's conscience, not the creator itself. Hey, if it will get the man's attention why not? Nightmare began to chuckle her approval for whatever he had planning.  
  
Thunder smiled, "Sure. I can go with God."  
  
If this was even a little odd, Fudge gave no indication and promptly dropped his knees and proclaimed, "What can I do for you, Oh Holy One?"  
  
Nightmare busted out laughing. Thunder placed a mute charm on her so Fudge couldn't hear her. Oh yeah, This was going to be fun.  
  
"I have a message for you, Fudge. I want you to do as I have directed. Is that understood?"  
  
"Yes, Oh Lord."  
  
"I want you to pardon Sirius black. He is innocent."  
  
"What, Oh Great One? I can't pardon Black. His crimes are too great."  
  
"Excuse me? Are you questioning me?"  
  
"It's not that, Oh Wise God. It's just I need some proof."  
  
"You are questioning me."  
  
Fudge paled at the implications of what the voice just said. If there was ever a time when Fudge would have peed his pant, this would have been it. Fudge began to grovel for forgiveness.  
  
"I'm sorry, Oh Great Smiter."  
  
Thunder turned to Nightmare and asked the all important question, 'What in Hades is Smiting?"  
  
Nightmare just shrugged and motioned that he move it along. Thunder nodded and returned his attention to Fudge.  
  
"Just don't let it happen again. You want proof, huh? I'll give you proof. Behold the real killer."  
  
Nothing happen. Fudge waited with abated breath. Nightmare started laughing again. Thunder grumbled angrily causing the walls to shake.  
  
"I said behold the real killer!!"  
  
Still nothing happened. Nightmare was joking about something called Murphy's Law. Thunder was plotting several horrible ways he was going to torture Present when he got his hands on him.  
  
Suddenly a portal opened above Fudge's desk. A scream could be heard, gradually growing louder with each passing second. Soon a grown up Peter Pettigrew crashed on to Fudge's desk. He was tied up. Fudge cautiously approached the man.  
  
"Who is this?" Fudge asked.  
  
"The real killer. Tell him, Rat or I'll sic you know who back on you." Thunder growled.  
  
Peter's eyes widened and he began to confess, "I did it. I sold the Potters to Voldemort and Framed Sirius for it. I did it all. Don't let them take me back. It's horrible there. I can still hear their screams as he killed them. Please send me to Azkaban, nice quiet Azkaban."  
  
Fudge was impressed and confused on what to do. The voice of God must have sensed it as it began to boom out orders again. Fudge scrambled to do as it requested.  
  
"There's your proof. Now that pardon. Send it to Dumbledore. He knows how to get it to Black."  
  
"I knew Dumbledore was hiding Black."  
  
"Excuse Me?!"  
  
"Sorry. Just some random thought."  
  
"Fine, also you should hold a press conference with The Prophet. It won't do if some trigger happy wizard tried to curse him. You better make sure Wormtail gives you the whole story, I wouldn't like it if he were freed on a technicality."  
  
Fudge quickly wrote out the pardon and sent it out as fast as possible. He also wrote a memo to his assistant to schedule a press conference with The Prophet. He worked so fast. He didn't notice that the Voice was gone after it congratulated him. By the time Fudge was done with everything, he had a weeping Wormtail and no voice to order him about. Fudge called in two Aurors to remove Peter.  
  
Soon Fudge was alone. He placed his head on his desk. This day couldn't possible get much worse. His assistant knocked on his door before entering. Percy Weasley smiled at the ragged Minister.  
  
"Sir, A reporter from the Prophet is here." Percy stated importantly.  
  
"Show them in, Weasley."  
  
"Yes, sir. This way, miss."  
  
Rita Skeeter entered the office in her normal flamboyant way. She smiled sweetly at Fudge. Fudge groaned as he banged his head on the desk. What did he do to deserve this? In his mind, a young girl's voice chuckled about Murphy's Law, anything that can go wrong, will.  
  
"God help me." Fudge whispered.  
  
"I'm so not dealing with her either. You are on your own." 'God' whispered in his ear.  
  
**************************************************************  
  
MW: Well, what do you think?  
  
DB: You are so going to hell, but I'll be there with you, so let's have fun.  
  
MW: Hell yeah. Don't forget to Review. Buh- Bye. 


End file.
